Today we have a special guest blogger...my Mom. (hint, hint....earning some points here!)
Here is what she would like to share:
Summary of my very strange and very annoying night/morning.
9:00 pm - Almost asleep
9:15 pm - Husband comes to bed
9:20 pm - Husband is still squirming,
snorting, sniffling, scooching, kicking
9:21 pm - Now awake and need to potty
9:23 pm - The horrendous music begins
- snore, snort, gasp, grind
10:20 pm - The horrendous music continues
and is now unbearable. No amount of kicking, poking or slapping shuts him
up. Now really aggravated.
10:21 pm - Pillow in hand going to the
sofa - can't shut the door or won't hear the alarm in morning. Think..."Why
is it that I'm always the one that has to sleep on the sofa?"
10:21 pm - TV on, pillow and blankey
all comfy. Hmmmmm....
10:23 pm - Computer whining and grinding
- get up and check - it's still running it's scan and finding viruses.
Great. tomorrows soon enough to deal with that!
10:25 pm - Computer sounds it's 'boink'
- scan complete - computer goes to sleep. ahhhh........
10:26 pm - turn up the TV; it's not
loud enough to be heard over the upstairs racket
10:27 pm - finally the monotonous hum
of the TV show drowns out the annoying racket
11:?? pm - Ah,..... sleep. blessed sleep
- turn off the TV roll over.
??:?? AM - TV turns itself on, off,
on, off, on, off, on, and wakes me up
??:?? AM - I watch the remote work all
by itself proceeding to turn the TV on, off, on, off, on, off, on..........
nothing visible is touching the remote which is laying on the coffee table
but the on/off button continues light up (on and off) as the TV takes it's
cue and does the same thing. Now I'm awake - again! The TV is blasting
on and off in the finally quiet house and no one is touching the remote.
Now I'm getting creeped out but too tired to worry about ghosts. I rip
the battery out of the remote and all goes quiet again....for one very
short, very blissful minute until......................snore, snort, gasp,
grind, snore, snort, gasp, grind. Argh..........
??:?? AM - Pillow goes over my head
and I fall back asleep. Ahhhhh....
4:10 AM - BLARING ALARM BUZZER. OH
GOD! Please, I'm so tired! Someone upstairs, please turn it off!
4:12 AM - BLARING ALARM BUZZER - still
sounding off. God, can't he hear that?
4:13 AM - trudging back upstairs with
my pillow in hand to turn off the damn alarm. Tempted to whack someone
in the head with my pillow on the way past. Of course he is blissfully
sleeping. Please, just let me get a few more minutes sleep. Hit
the snooze!
4:22: AM - BLARING ALARM BUZZER - and
I've had it. Just get up. Get ready for work. Drown myself in the
shower!
5:00 AM - I hear this very bright, very
well rested, very upbeat.....Good morning! I see RED - partly because
my eyes are so bloodshot from LACK of sleep! I just have to get out
the door before I say and do something I may regret.
5:35 AM - Turnpike visibility is nil
- can't see anything through the driving rain. Oh great another stupid
tractor trailer passing me in the left lane (don't you know you're not
suppose to be in the left lane you idiot?) and then there's the one in
the right lane who I've been watching drive off the road every so many
feet. And finally there's the guy in front of me who is petrified
of driving and keeps putting his foot on the brake every 4 seconds.
Tractor Trailer passes - WALL OF WATER!
Don't panic! Don't hit the brake! OMG! I can't see anything!
Thank God there is perfect silence in
the seat next to me. Probably because my car-pooler has just crapped himself.
Skid Mark!
6:10 AM - Ah finally at work! Peace
at last!
Gail





Comments