Mornings.......

That was all I could say when I wrote that title...Mornings.....

Mine are not fun...during the week that is.  This morning, I woke up thinking how happy I am that it's Saturday....then I opened my eyes and realized....it's not!  I HATE THAT!

Anyway, my morning consists of alarm going off, hitting snooze (twice), and getting out of bed ever so carefully and sprinting to the bathroom in hopes that the kids won't wake up and I can take my shower in peace.  This generally happens maybe twice a month.  The other times? ...they are both in the bathroom (and it is, I swear, a 3x3 room!).  Usually J Girl is sitting on the potty reading a book or playing with her horses why J Boy opens and shuts the shower curtain screaming "Mommy!" until my ears are bleeding.  Then he will take anything that is within his reach and try to shove it between J Girl's butt and the toilet seat!  She screams, I open the curtain, water gets all over the floor and we start the process all over again until I am finished.

After my shower, I get their breakfast ready in my towel sit them down and have them eat while I get dressed and get their clothes out....you would think, wow, she has it all worked out huh?  NOPE!
Now the fighting begins..he has more, stop it, he's pinching me, mommy, he isn't eating, he fed the dog, bite.....now THAT's got me running because we all know that when the boy is angry BITE usually means, well, that he is gonna BITE! 

At this point, we have about 15 minutes before we HAVE to be out of the house, and I still need to dress them, dry my hair, brush our teeth, put coats on, let the dog out, get their bag together, make sure lunch is packed, throw a load of laundry in, wash dishes, and oh crap, don't forget to let the dog in!

The point I am trying to make as I ramble on is just why, this particular morning, is worse than others.  You see, after I dry me hair, we all brush our teeth...and remember, our bathroom is 3x3.  So the kids stand on the toilet, yeah both of them, in an effort to reach the sink.  Now picture this.....here we are brushing away, making sure that we get all the way in the back (because the dentist is mean and who really wants to piss him off when he is sticking sharp objects in your mouth!)  when suddenly, I go to rinse my brush and J Boy SPITS on it.  That's right.....ON MY TOOTHBRUSH!  YUCK!  You may be my son, I may have birthed you, but by no means does that give you the right to SPIT ON MY TOOTHBRUSH! THE END.






















   

Comments

[BusyDad]

Best feeling in the world: trying to wake up to the alarm clock and realizing it's Saturday. Worst feeling: what you described. And my son has recently decided that putting out candles (you know the scented ones in a glass) by spitting on them is a lot more fun than simply blowing them out. Talk about yuck.

[Robert]

That is hysterical. Not for you, I'm sure. At least he didn't spit on your freshly dried hair as you leaned forward to spit! We keep thinking of having another baby but some of your stories make us awfully glad to have just one. But I guess if (more like when) we have more then I can offer some counter stories. All our stories thus far are just plain ol cute and would make you hate us. :)