Sunday was a bright and sunny day.
And with bright, sunny and refreshing warmth, comes......a broken dryer.
Unfortunately for us, Sunday was to be laundry day. Which meant that we did not have very many clean clothes. Well, at least me, since my things are always last to get done.
Fast forward to Tuesday. Today.
After scrounging around my closet for a while (in the dark since the kiddies were still sleeping, in my bed,and we all know you never wake a sleeping kiddie. Kinda like a bear. They get real grumpy and could quite possibly eat you for breakfast) I finally found a pair of jeans. And a cute, longish sweater, which will be important later.
Blah blah blah, the usual morning routine, drop the kids off, go to work, pick the kids up and end up back home again. Your normal week day.
It was about 7pm. I was in the hall way, bending over to pick up a toy or ball or whatever was thrown on the floor after use.
Rrrrrrrrriiiiiippppppppppp!
Huh, I thought. Wonder what that was as I reached for my behind out of instinct.
Oh My God!
"Dave! Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave!" I scream just in case he didn't hear my the first time.
"What?" he answers annoyed from the other room.
"I have a hole in my pants!" I yell back.
"So." he says.
"No, you don't understand! I totally forgot these jeans had a hole in the butt!"
"So."
"NO! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!" I yell shrilly for effect, "I WENT TO WORK WITH A HOLE IN MY BUTT!"
Laughter immediately follows. Not by me.
"Let me see. Bend over." he tells me as he walks into the hallway.
"No! They just ripped more!"
"Bend over!" he says while not successfully holding in his laughter.
"Okay. Tell me how noticeable this is." as I turn around.
More laughter.
"Seriously! How bad is it?" I plead.
"Not bad really. Your sweater covers most of it." he replies.
"Most?"
"Yea. I doubt anyone was looking at your butt anyway." he answers.
Oh no he didn't.
"Why wouldn't they look at my butt?" I ask.
"No. I'm not saying it like that." he stammers and begins to back-pedal, "I meant professionals don't look at butts. Not that your butt isn't look-able. It's just that, well, you don't work at a construction site."
"Why? You look at butts when you are on site?" I ask with the look. You know, the LOOK.
"No, no. Not me. But the other guys." as I watch his face turn red with the pleading eyes.
And THAT is how I stopped the laughter.
Plus I threw in a Home Depot run just to add a little insult to injury.
Besides, Mama needs a dryer. And if she needed it at the most inconvenient hour, well, score for her.
Maybe he will think twice next time about insulting my butt. Hole and all.
Lisa from Boondock Ramblings sent me and I'm glad she did. Brilliant! Thank you for this lovely ending to my Sunday night!
Posted by: Sprite's Keeper | 19 April 2009 at 10:36 PM
I'm sure people look at your butt all day long. I'm looking right now, actually.
Posted by: debbie | 10 April 2009 at 08:34 AM
This sounds like something my Dave and I would do. Except my sweater wouldn't cover the hole. Sigh.
Posted by: Leanne | 09 April 2009 at 02:47 PM
No way! Sounds totally like something I would do! Oh man!
And your hubby laughing and then stopping...priceless!
Posted by: lisa | 08 April 2009 at 04:37 PM
Now THAT is how you work it and get a new dryer. Well done!
Posted by: Burgh Baby | 08 April 2009 at 01:37 PM
oh no! lmao...that is really bad.
Posted by: staciesmadness | 08 April 2009 at 11:23 AM
LOL!! You are hilarious! That sounded like something on a sitcom!
Posted by: Rachel | 08 April 2009 at 07:44 AM
Hole and all.. LMAO! Perfect ending.
Get it?? Ending??
Posted by: Chris | 08 April 2009 at 01:36 AM